Texts From Last Night

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  (323): View more from California

  Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me

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  (323): Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me http://tfl.nu/d8jq
  Replies (9) Good night (4600) Bad night (2208)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?

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  (503): Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem? http://tfl.nu/dk03
  Replies (24) Good night (873) Bad night (3275)
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  (408): View more from California

  we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.

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  (408): we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this. http://tfl.nu/wyn5
  Replies (22) Good night (842) Bad night (3638)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties

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  (416): i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties http://tfl.nu/mxe3
  Replies (9) Good night (2926) Bad night (1139)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.

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  (440): yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything. http://tfl.nu/2obm
  Replies (3) Good night (3095) Bad night (893)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"

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  (859): Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed" http://tfl.nu/i5mp
  Replies (6) Good night (2103) Bad night (537)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life

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  (513): you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life http://tfl.nu/50v2
  Replies (4) Good night (829) Bad night (670)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.

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  (269): When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor. http://tfl.nu/zxit
  Replies (4) Good night (1257) Bad night (433)
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  (530): View more from California

  I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.

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  (530): I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing. http://tfl.nu/7jie
  Replies (6) Good night (1157) Bad night (423)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.

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  (410): I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man. http://tfl.nu/n99f
  Replies (2) Good night (431) Bad night (670)
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  (921): View more from

  Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.

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  (921): Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket. http://tfl.nu/0gfl
  Replies (2) Good night (542) Bad night (295)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese

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  (614): I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese http://tfl.nu/xpqp
  Replies (2) Good night (856) Bad night (375)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca

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  (301): i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca http://tfl.nu/knhd
  Replies (1) Good night (425) Bad night (146)
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  (848): View more from New Jersey

  Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.

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  (848): Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me. http://tfl.nu/oekv
  Replies (0) Good night (366) Bad night (190)
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  (408): View more from California

  Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.

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  (408): Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard. http://tfl.nu/3g4r
  Replies (3) Good night (321) Bad night (132)

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