And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Drunk is not a location!
I'm bleeding and have questions
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
