i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Randomize
