Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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