I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
