i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Randomize