'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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