dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize