Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I have peed in a lot of sinks
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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