Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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