Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
