isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
