Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Randomize
