I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
