Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Randomize
