he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
