And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.