youre lurking in front of me
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
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