Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
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I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
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