I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
