I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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