so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
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Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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