I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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