i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
dude. I can hear the air.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
