I forgot how hot balto sounded
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
