he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize