Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
