I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Pants are for mortals
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
