someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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