Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
