I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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