Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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