yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
there was a trapeze. enough said
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
PS: I just woke up from my shower
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
