I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
