last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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