Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
