It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
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