I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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