I could make wine with my vomit
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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