Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Randomize
