My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i may or may not be watching the land before time
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
