What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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