PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize