Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
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