It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
