I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
