Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
