Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize