not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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