i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
