About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize